Never Forget Who You Are
by Candy
Summary: Amidala's death through Vader's Eyes


AN: HEY ALL! Candy's back again! This is a weird kinda fic... about the death of Amidala... so just kinda go with it...   
  
Disclaimer: 2 words: George Lucas  
  
Never Forget Who You Are  
  
I don't quite remember how we were able to get Amidala here. She was always so stubborn... so prideful... so brave... so beautiful. She put up quite a fight, even I was impressed. Especially for a woman who gave birth just a month ago. I do believe if she had been in better condition, she would've escaped... and killed my Emperor. But not me.  
  
Never me.  
  
She doesn't have the courage to do that... nor the strength. But quite frankly... I don't have the strength to do that to her either.   
  
Siduous does not intend to killer. He told me so. He's just going to threaten her... until she tells me where my son is. Until she tells me where Ben took him. Then we could keep her prisoner or maybe even turn her! I smile under the cool metal of my black helmet. We could finally be together again.  
  
I adjust my cape and look back at the reflection in the mirror. What do I see?   
  
A monster.  
  
A machine.  
  
But not Anakin... never Anakin.  
  
If I had any feeling left in my heart and soul... I might cry. But all I have is anger... and I can use that well. It gives me strength. It gives me power... security. It makes sure that I have something to hold onto... something I can rely on.  
  
In a sense... anger is my ally.  
  
My friend.  
  
I tear my gaze from my reflection, turn on my heal and strut out the automatic doors. I walk with my masked head held high and into the meeting room where a table with 6 chairs and a beautiful view of the galaxy is displayed for me via the windows. The stars are bright tonight..  
  
I shut my eyes.  
  
~ "I'm gunna be the first one to see them all!" ~  
  
The voice echoes in my head from so long ago... 14 years ago... I looked up into the sky and saw... in all their glory... the stars. Qui-Gon had been with me then. He encouraged my dream. My dream to be a Jedi... if not for him... I wouldn't be where I am now.  
  
I wouldn't be a Jedi.  
  
I wouldn't be a Sith.  
  
I wouldn't be Darth Vader...  
  
I look from the stars to my master. He is wearing his usual garb... the black hood get up over the white wrinkly skin... lovely. He sits at the head of the table looking down.   
  
Meditating probably.  
  
"On the contrary my young apprentice." I twitch a bit at the cold in his voice. That still gets to me... HE still gets to me... Even though its been like this for some odd years... his voice still chills me to my core. He continues on. "I was just waiting for you to come... and then we could get down to buissiness." I can only reply as I always do. "Yes, my Master." I take my seat at the other end of the table and wait. Suddenly the doors slide open to reveal 4 battle droids crowded around my wife.  
  
I feel my mechanical lungs continue working... but the sight of her always makes my breath stop. She looks battered. Her long chestnut hair is limp, her head is slightly lowered, but I can tell her lower lip is swollen. Her violet gown is rumpled. And tear marks stain her porceline cheeks.   
  
I turn my head to my master.  
  
He smiles evilly.  
  
Oh Amidala...  
  
The head droid pushes her into a chair on my left side. I look over at her. Her head is completely lowered now, and her bound hands rest in her lap. Another tear slips off her face and onto the white tabletop. My poor angel...  
  
If only you had listened to reason! If only you had told me where Luke was... if only... Then you wouldn't be like this. You would be living a new life... you would be living with me. We'd be together again joined by the darkside.   
  
Palpatine speaks with a sneer. "So Amidala... are you ready to confess?" She does not answer, but looks up and over at me.   
  
My breath does stop this time.  
  
Her face is completely bruised. She was obviously beaten severely by the gaurds. Her neck is bruised as well... as if someone were trying to choke her. I feel confusion form in my head. Funny... the droids don't have the capabilities to do that...   
  
I look over at my master.  
  
The force choke... He must've used that on her.   
  
More tears stream down her face as she looks at me... no... at what I have become. "WELL?" Palpatine's voice rings throughout the room. I glance from her to him. He is angry. His jaw twitches slightly as does his shoulders.  
  
One of the mechanical droids steps forward and hits Amidala in the back of the head roughly. She slumps forward with a groan and its robotic voice echoes through the room. "The emperor said speak, weakling!" She doesn't move. The droid smacks her again.  
I feel my hand twitch, and clench my fist. "SPEAK!" my master yells. I shut my eyes behind the mask.  
  
*SMACK*  
  
*SMACK*  
  
*SMACK*  
  
"You will speak!" the droid orders. It cocks it's laser gun and aims for her head. "Or else!"  
  
I look over at my master.   
  
He is smiling as Amidala's spirit breaks.  
  
Amidala whimpers.  
  
I can take no more.   
  
"STOP!" I hear myself scream as I raise my hand, and with a flick of the wrist, I throw the droid into the wall. She looks up at me in surprise. My master looks at me with anger. "FOOL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" he screams. I lower my head. "Forgive me my master... but if he was to kill her how-" I feel a sharp bolt of electricity smack me in my stomach and spasm. My body shakes in convulsions.   
  
I hear Amidala gasp, and shoot up out of her seat. I head the remaining droids cock back their guns and aim at her. "YOU MONSTER!" she screams at my master in her regal voice. My eyes flutter shut, then open again to see her staring daggers at Palpatine. "YOU USE HIM," she points over at me, "TO DO YOUR DIRTY WORK!" her voice lowers. "You're a coward, Palpatine. You never COULD do ANYTHING yourself could you?" She growls and continues.   
  
She must have a death wish if she's going to speak to him like that.  
  
"YOU had to use ME to get you higher in the Senate. You lacked the guts, conviction, and courage to do THAT yourself. YOU used the SENATE to gain power and control over the galaxy. AND NOW YOU USE HIM! FOR WHAT? SO YOU CAN CONTINUE YOUR PITIFUL RULE OVER THE UNIVERSE?" My convulsions stop and I sit up slightly... I look at her. If I could I would plead with my eyes for her to stop. She is digging her own grave... I reach out to her mind.  
  
~ Please, Ami... don't do this! ~  
  
She stops briefly and looks over at me. And I feel like a fool.  
  
She has all the love in the galaxy for me. I can see it in her eyes. No matter what form I'm in... no matter how I act... she loved me... and I betrayed that because of my insecurities.   
  
I feel a familiar light burn in my heart... a light of the living force... a light that she shines  
  
She looks away from me and back at him. "Well guess what, Palpy?" She smirks. "You can't use him forever." She walks over to me, her hands bound, face bloodied, and looks at me. She looks through the mask and into my heart... my heart that can't hold on much longer... if she dies. And not turning away she continues.  
  
"He isn't as dark as you think. You think you've changed him?" She looks at him. "Well you haven't! He WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER! Be the man you WANT him to be... Oh he may follow you for awhile loyally... he may SEEM to be the PERFECT Sith... But in the end... you're going to see..." She looks back at me and grabs my hands. "You're going to see that he has a heart." She glares over at him. "And that YOU were the fool for choosing HIM to do your dirty work."   
  
I feel myself smile underneath my metal prison. Oh Ami... if only I could... I would kiss you. I would hold you... I would tell you I loved you and that I was so sorry... She does not release her hold on my hands and looks at me. I glance sideways at my master.   
  
He begins to laugh.  
  
I hate that laugh...  
  
"YOU, Amidala, are the fool." He mutters evilly. He slams the droids aside with a flick of his wrist and into the wall. They explode on impact. I turn my head and look him fully in the eye.  
  
What the force is he doing?  
  
"YOU want ME to do my own work, queenie?" He asks with rage in his voice. He raises from his chair and holds his hands above his head. They begin to glow.  
  
"THEN I WILL!"  
  
I didn't have time at all to react. It happed so fast... yet it seemed so slow...  
  
Amidala's eye widened as the lightning bolt that formed in his hand hit her. She lost her hold on my hands, and convulsing violently, smashed against the wall, and slumped to the floor. I looked over at my master. If he could've seen my eyes, he would've cowered with fear.   
  
"I do a fine job on my own, DON'T I, Amidala?" He asks. He laughs shortly and exits the room.  
  
I run over to Amidala and hold her in my arms. "AMI?" I yell. "AMI!" She was still shaking violently from the blast. There was no way she would survive. "AMI! OH GODS!" Her eyes flutter open and she looks at me. I swear I think she saw the old me... and not the machine that I am. "Ani..." she whispered hoarsely. I felt my heart shatter. "I'm here, Ami." She places one hand lightly on the cheek of my mask, and whispers,  
  
"Ani... I know who you are... you're still... you're still the Ani I fell in love with... Underneath the mask, and the metal...you're still there." She takes in one final shaky breath and closes her eyes, as a tear slips down her cheek. With her final breath she whispers:   
  
"Never forget... who you are..."  
  
Her hand falls from my cheek.  
  
Her tear smacks against the floor.  
  
And she's gone.  
  
I don't know how to react. But I hold her limp body close to mine, and shake. Oh, Ami... why did u defy him like that?   
  
Him!   
  
I feel my blood boil and my anger swell. I sigh shakily and calm myself. I will kill Palpatine. One day I will... after careful planning and when I am ready, I will strike him down.  
  
I hear Ami's words echo in my head.  
  
"Never forget... who you are."  
  
Oh Ami... how can I remember who I am... when there's no one left to remind me?  
  
I hold her close again.   
  
I will try not to forget Ami.  
  
I will try...   
  
THE END  



End file.
